Seriously

 

Blitz_Silver_Bracelet_2

2NNmisu

Jewelry that looks like a tool, how poignant is that?  Zoolander’s Derelicte fashion line comes to life in this item, and it only took 13 years for parody to become reality.  The idea that manual labor would become a fashion fetish for the affluent, what’s next? Mechanics overalls on the catwalks of Milan?

If someone paid me money to come up with a single object that could be used to define and ridicule this entire movement, I couldn’t have done it better than this.  Irony levels off the fucking charts.  The entire e-store of Blitz bikes is the same.  It’s almost impossible to parody.  The Sarah Palin of motorcycle websites.

Think the major manufacturers are just as bad with their merchandise?  Consider these two items and their respective prices:

http://shop.ducati.com/ie/accessories/clothing-accessories/scarfs-bandana/metropolitan-aw13-pashmina.html

http://blitzmotorcycles.bigcartel.com/product/barber-kit-scarf

15 thoughts on “Seriously

  1. I love the fact that they choose a 12-point box end. Perfect for these hipster douchebags to use when rounding off fasteners…

  2. But… it’s sterling silver and so butch! If you are curious, 60 grams of PURE silver would cost $37.80 on a commodity exchange, so figure maybe $50 at a jeweler. Now the 450 Euro price of this item is $621.72 USD. So they are charging more than ten times the price of pure silver (Sterling silver is 92.5% pure silver). But then you do get a 100% natural leather bag. Whoopee.

  3. 14mm? please!?!? with all the fukwits turning to choppers and putting the word “vintage” in every sentence the least they could have done was make it 9/16.

  4. I think it looks pretty cool really but it’d be cooler if it was a real spanner and had been bent up for you by a mate of your cousins who is a back patch wearing ex con enforcer from Portsmouth called Dogbreath. Oh and he’s bent it by hand and it’s imperial of course.

    ….hang on, this happened. they either stole my idea or Dogbreath emigrated to Paris.

    • Generally the problem with the subject in question is explained right under it.

      Yep, I checked. Right under the picture, an explanation.

  5. oh shit! Hipsters is like us, brazilians, but we paid 12354648641346 times more for everything because our government rape us with extreme taxes.

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