Chopper Con

This trailer does not do the film justice, please go watch the full movie on Netflix.

The movie is the story of a bunch of motorcycle suspension experts riding their bikes to Chopper Con in Brooklyn. Chopper Con is the premiere convention for chopper reenactment enthusiasts and everyone competes to show up in their best dirtbag costumes. Along the way they enjoy things like constantly running out of gas and expressing their paint by numbers individuality. This thrilling tale of recycling your grandparents counter culture is¬†narrated by the T1000, who seems to have gotten stuck in Sam Elliot impersonator mode. This may be the most pompous narration we’ve ever heard.

Seriously folks, these guys are in no way losers or counter culture. This sort of thing is as trendy as it gets these days. While their motorcycles may lack front brakes, they will not lack for admiration, attention, or crowdfunded money. If it’s real modern day outlaws you’re after take a look at the Baltimore wheelie kids¬†or the Midwestern stunna bros, a bunch of wild ass kids upsetting the constabulary. Nothing in this film would get these dudes listed in a pdf for subjects of interest by any police dept.



17 thoughts on “Chopper Con

  1. the narration in this is completely and utterly insane. “”If they didn’t make the Brooklyn bike show it would mean they would be missing out”…High stakes with this ride bro

  2. 21 Days Under The Corporate Sky*….capturing the essence of”Individuality”.
    More lookatme crap as “expression”.I can hear their moms now-“don’t let
    Me find out you’re not wearing your Gringo!”

  3. I did enjoy the movie when I watched it mostly because I was laid up and jonesing to ride on a long trip. I love choppers. I must say I almost choked on some of the writing and narration. Did the writer even make the ride or just wax poetic about it ? ” The corn , the corn , the corn. ” WTH???

    Reminds me of Apocalypse Now…the horror, the horror, the horror…. the words kept going through my head as I heard the narration of the horrible writing. Some clever , most just wow or maybe I should say Ow.

    I think my girlfriend said it best when she walked in and said ” oh hell no .. they are trying to be zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance. ”

    Worth watching yes. Kudos to the 4 guys for riding across country on hard tail choppers. Even though they seemed to have an endless supply of shops available us mere mortals could never afford to use day after day after day. Kudos for having some scenery from some interesting places. 2 Kudos for the 1 percent footage .

    The rest is mildly painful. In a couple of spots during the narration I felt a headache coming on.

  4. Nothing on this page describes the abhorrer this films reeks. It is the holy grail of hipster biker bullshit. Not a frame in it is redeemable. My girlfriend nearly left me because I even tried to watch it not realizing what I was going to see. I begged her that I was just checking out some new flick, but she didn’t buy it, she knew what I was secretly looking for, a biker movie fix. I was guilty. But for it to be this film, I’ve lost all credibility and even my bashing it she see’s through me. I am soiled. I wish I would have watched the beginning by myself first. I would have rather been caught with porn.

  5. I grew up enjoying motorcycles. My father was a Brit-bike dealer/racer in the 50s/early 60s, I used to ride through the woods as a kid all day every day of the summer, and spent years riding as fast as my bikes could go on the street. Tragically I am now usually embarrassed to even ride a motorcycle at all, because if I end up in any traffic going slow enough so anyone can keep up with me, or if I use a bike to run a practical errand, there is always a gaggle of assholes ready to give me a thumbs-up, to say “nice-bike” or to outright tell me I am “cool”, as if they are some sort of authority on that. I don’t even want to leave a bike sitting outside in the driveway because they are such asshole magnets now. Let me be clear, I don’t want to know you or even wave to you because you ride a motorcycle, especially if it is a “chopper” “bobber”, “cafe” , “vintage” , “rat” or a participant in any other trendy fashion,, if you are interested in knowing how much my bike is worth, among many other horrible things that have been done to motorcycling in the last 36 years since the Evolution Harley became available. The only motorcyclists I have respect for anymore are the kids I hear late at night on a nearby interstate highway winding out their sport-bikes in high gear, surely going fast enough that they are one mistake away from death.

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